Well...

by Sascha Morgan

 

"Oh shit! It's her!" Bobby whispered frantically.

Remy looked up from the CDs he was going through. "Quoi?" They were at the mall.

They were supposed to be shopping for groceries, but then Gambit had remembered

that he had some CDs he'd been wanting to buy for weeks, and Bobby had

remembered some magazines he wanted to buy, so.. Well, they hadn't gotten to the

grocery part yet.

"Oh Gooood!" Bobby moaned. "She's heading this way! Remy, you've gotta save me!"

"How? An' why?"

"I dunno.. But you've gotta do something!"

Remy decided to follow Bobby's stare and find out who he was looking at. He

blinked. "Woah!" The woman walking with firm steps towards them was tall, at

least 6 feet, blonde and looked like a model. Why in the name of all things

sacred would Bobby want to be rescued from her? He said that out loud and

watched Bobby squirm.

"Well, see, it's complicated.. But she wants to marry me."

"Say again?"

"There's no time!" Bobby suddenly got a determined look on his face."I've got an

idea.."

'‑‑Oh‑uh‑‑' Remy thought.

"..You just play along okay? I'll owe you one!"

'Now we're talkin' my kind of language.' Remy grinned. "Deal. But remember y'll

owe me. An' dat big time too, if I know y'.."

"Yeah, yeah." Bobby's arm went around Remy's waist and the younger man pulled

the Cajun closer.

"What de..?" Remy exclaimed.

"Play along!" Bobby hissed. A huge fake grin appeared on his face as the

model‑woman came up to them.

"Hi Milli."

"Vanilli?" Remy muttered under his breath and had no problems giving Milli a

brilliant grin. Well, at least not until she started talking..

"*Bobby*, I'm so *happy* to see you!" Her voice was very, very loud. "And *who*

is that *absolutely* adorable man?" And she emphasized every third word or so.

Remy's grin turned just as fake as Bobby's.

"Milli, this is Remy LeBeau. Remy, this is Milli Weir," Bobby introduced them,

still keeping his left arm around Remy's waist.

"*Remy*, what an *adorable* name!" Milli exclaimed. "I'm so *glad* I met you!

Are you one of Bobby's *friends*? He *always* talk about you! Did you *know*

that?"

Remy mutely shook his head. He wasn't even going to try and charm that woman. He

was pretty sure that would backfire.

"Well, he *does*! We are getting *married* you know. Bobby just have to find a

*date* first!"Bobby took a deep breath.

"I'm not going to marry you," he said.

"*WHAT?*" Milli screamed. "*What* did you *say*? I cannot *believe* you said

*that*! Of course we're getting *married*! What kind of *girl* do you think I

*am*?" With her hands on her hips like that, she looked kind of scary, Remy

decided.

"I..I..I.." Bobby stuttered.

"*What* do you have to *say* for yourself?" Milli asked, her eyes shooting

lightning bolts at Bobby. Remy thought she was overreacting just a tad here. Not

that he was going to say that to her. He was too fond of living.

"I've decided that I'm gay and Remy is my boyfriend and we're going to settle

down and adopt some kids and stuff like that and I'm really sorry but I can't

marry you because I don't think that would be such a good idea." Bobby blurted

out without taking a breath.  Remy and Milli stared at him in shock.

"What?" Remy said faintly. Okay, so he'd known that Bobby's idea was going to be

bad, but that it was going to be *that* bad... He winced. Now he'd started

emphasizing everything too. 'What a time for the boy to step out of the

closet..'"

“WHAT?!" Milli shouted. "You're *what*?!"

"Um.." Bobby swallowed and pulled Remy even closer. "I'm gay.. I was just in

denial, see, but Remy here helped me realize that I was really gay, didn't you?"

"Huh?" Remy said and wondered if he could kill Bobby later. Maybe he could fix

an 'accident' during a Danger Room exercise or something.. This was so going to

ruin his reputation as a ladies man. And Remy had no doubts the story would be

all over the mansion, not to mention the city, within a couple of hours. 'Wonder

what Rogue is going to say...'

Milli turned her head to glare at Remy instead. "*YOU*!"

"Eh," Remy said. "Dis is not... He's delusional.. Forgot to take his pills

today.. Y'know..."

"Humph!" Milli said. She stood there, looking at them for a while, quite

obviously not enjoying what she saw. "This is a *joke*, right?" She started

smiling.

"I'm afraid not," Bobby said.

Milli stopped smiling. "I don't *believe* you! You weren't gay *two*weeks ago,

and now *suddenly* you are? Do you *know* what my brothers would *do* to you if

they found out that you had *left* me at the alter?"

Remy didn't know about Bobby, but he was getting some pretty vivid pictures of

what Milli's brothers would do to Bobby. Of course in his mind he was standing

there cheering them on..

"I told you, I was in denial," Bobby said. He obviously wasn't going to back up

now.

"In *denial* my ass! You just don't want to *marry* me, is that it?"

Remy almost nodded, but Bobby was looking desperately at him, and well, he just

couldn't. 'I'm too nice,' he told himself. 'I'm just too goddamn nice!'

"That's not it at all!" Bobby protested and lied through his teeth."I'd love to

marry you, but since I'm gay I don't think that would be such a good idea."

"HA!" Milli said. She folded her arms over her chest. "Alright, if he's your

*boyfriend*, I suppose you *kiss* each other once in a while, *right*?"

"...Yeah?" Bobby said slowly.

'She's not going to say what I think she's going to say,' Gambit tried to

convince himself. 'She's not!'

"Then *kiss* him!"

'Merde. She is.'

"What?" Bobby looked shocked. Hadn't been expecting that most likely, Remy

thought. Maybe that would teach him to think things through? Nah.

"Here? Now?" Bobby continued.

Milli nodded. "Yes. *Here*, *now*."

"But, but, but," Bobby stuttered.

"I *knew* it!" Milli said triumphantly. "He's *not* your boyfriend, is he? And

*you're* not gay, this is just a *joke*, isn't it?"

Remy could feel Bobby tense and suddenly he knew that he would kiss him if it

meant that he could escape Milli and the wedding. 'No WAY! A mans gotta draw the

line somewhere! I'm not *that* bloody nice!'

Well, since Bobby acted rather quickly once he'd decided on something, Remy

didn't have much time to draw anything before Bobby turned around, used the arm

he still had around his waist to pull him closer and kissed him. Remy opened his

mouth to object and somehow managed to deepen what Bobby had intended to be only

a light kiss on the lips. 'Oh hell,' Remy thought. 'Well, the damage has already

been done. I might as well help him out.. But he's going to owe me  for this.'

He moved his arms around Bobby's waist.

'Who would have thought Bobby was such a good kisser?' he thought a little later

when Bobby pulled away. He glanced around to see if Milli was still there. She

wasn't. He breathed a sigh of relieve.

"Bobby," he said.

"Huh?" Bobby was looking at him with a confused expression on his face. He was

actually kind of cute. No he wasn't. Not at all. 'Bobby, cute? Did I mistake a

joint for a cigarette about ten minutes ago or what? Nevermind that.' Remy

decided to ponder about that later. Right now he had some favors to cash in.

Literally speaking. He held up the three CDs he wanted to buy. "Y' remember y'

said y' were gonna owe me?"

"Yeah?" Now Bobby was looking suspiciously at him.

Remy gave Bobby the CDs. "Y' can start payin' off y'r debt by buyin' me dese

t'ree."

Bobby grabbed the CDs, then turned them around to check the prize."What? Are you

nuts? Do you have any idea how much these costs?"

Remy nodded. "Yup."

"Man, I can't believe you're making me buy you CDs!"

"An' do de monitor watchin' for me de next two weeks," Remy added. They started

walking towards the cash register.

"No way!"

"An' Stormy said she needed someone to help her wit' de plants," he continued.

"Are you kidding me? She's covering them in muck as we're speaking!"

"So? Oh an' .."

"Oh c'mon! I don't owe you *that* much!"

"Oh yes y' do!"

"I do not!"

"Y' do as I say or I'll get de surveillance tape from de mall an' show it to de

others." Remy hoped he wouldn't have to follow through with that threat.

"What surveillance tape?"

Remy nodded towards a camera in a corner. "De one from dat camera."

"You wouldn't.. Would you?"

Remy grinned. "Wanna bet?"

Bobby sighed. "Okay, what do you want me to do?" He kept shaking his head as

Remy thought up things for him to do. All of them were stuff Remy should have

done or had promised to do as a favor for someone.

"Oh well," Bobby said when Remy couldn't come up with any more chores for him to

do. "I suppose it's worth it."

"Trust me, it's worth it. Y' got away from dat woman, didn't y'?"

Bobby nodded. "Not what I was thinking about, but yeah, I did. Thanks by the

way."

"Y're welcome. Now, go pay for my CDs."

 

 

It was breakfast time at the mansion and all the late sleepers had just crawled

out of their beds and stumbled in to the kitchen. Remy had just sat down with a

coffee cup when the phone rang. Jean got up to answer it.

"Bobby! Phone!" she shouted five seconds later.  Bobby looked up from his frozen sandwich.

"Yeah? Who is it?"

"A Milli something," Jean answered.  Bobby paled and Remy dropped his coffee cup.

"Say again?" Bobby said.

Jean handed him the phone. "It's a girl named Milli something," she repeated,

looking curiously at him.  Bobby looked at the phone then moved it, very carefully, up to his ear.

"Hello?" He paled even more. "Oh hi, Milli.. Yeah.. Uh.. No.. I.. What? No..

But.. But.. But.. Eh.. Remy? Well, he's.. No.. Yes.. I don't.. But..Milli, I..

Yes.. Seven? I don't think.. Yes... Of course.. Yes.." He put the phone down and

looked pleadingly over at Remy who was shaking his head."Remy?"

"Non, non an' yet again non!"

"But you have to!"

"Na‑ah." Remy shook his head and got up from his chair. He placed his cup and

plate in the dishwasher and walked out of the kitchen.

Bobby followed him. "Please!"

Jean and Rogue looked at each other, then shrugged and went back to mussing over

how much Scott reminded them of Fox Mulder from X‑Files. If he stood in a

certain way and the lighting was dimmed and if you squinted a little with your

left eye...

Remy slowed down and turned around to face Bobby. "Non."

"Pretty please? I mean, you've met her, you know what she's like.." Bobby

pleaded.

"Which is exactly *why* I won' help y'!"

"I'll do the monitor duty for you for the next two weeks!" Bobby offered.

Remy considered it. "Still not worth it. What is dis about anyway?"

"Eh," Bobby said. "Um.. Heublewamy," he added.

Remy blinked. "What?"

"I said: her brothers want to meet you," Bobby repeated a bit more audibly. "You have to do it! I don't want to marry her for Christ’s sake and it's too late to come up with something now.. Please?"

Remy sighed, then shook his head and started walking again. "It's still not

worth it." Bobby trailed along behind him. 'Undoubtingly trying to come up with

an offer I can't refuse', Remy thought. 'And considering how desperate he is,

and how desperate I would be if I were in his situation, he might actually come

up with something. Though I doubt it.'

"I'll pay you?" Bobby suggested.

"One, I'm not a whore, an' two, I've probably got more money dan y'anyway."

"Point. Um.. Paint your room?"

"No t'anks. I like it de way it is."

"Get Rogue to go out on a date with you?"

"If I thought y'd be able to do it, oui, but y' can'."

"I can, I can! After you've met Milli's brothers.."

"What do I look like? A complete idiot?"

"Eh.. " Bobby studied him. "Maybe not. But you have to do this! If you don't

she'll *know* it was a scam and her brothers are going to kill me. I don't wanna

be killed! I like living!"

"Tell her we broke up," Remy suggested. They were now outside and was headed

towards the garage. Or Remy was anyway. Bobby was still just trailing along,

trying to come up with something.

"Two days after she met you?" Bobby stared at him in disbelief. "She's not dumb

you know."

"Not so sure about dat. She believed dat t'ing about you an' me, didn' she?"

Remy pointed out.

"Not until‑‑"

"Please, don' remind me," Remy interrupted. "Why does she wan' to marry you

anyway?"

"I slept with her," Bobby said matter‑of‑factly.

Remy stared at him. "Y' slept wit' her an' now she wants to marry you? You're

dat good in de sack?"

"No!"Remy arched an eyebrow at that.

"I mean, yes.. I mean, she's old fashioned.. Sort of." He frowned. "She says

that since I slept with her I have to marry her, and apparently her brothers

think the same way."

"Can' be dat old fashioned if she slept wit' you," Remy commented.

"Well.." Bobby looked a bit sheepishly at him.

'Why do I get de feelin' I'm not gonna like dis?' Remy asked whatever deity that

was watching over him at that moment.

"She wants to have kids, and.." Bobby trailed off, looking innocently at the

garage ceiling.

"Don' tell me y' volunteered to be de father or somet'in' like dat.."

"Eh‑he."

"Y' didn'!" Remy looked at him in shock and decided that no matter what he said,

he was not going to help him get out of this. No way!

"Not exactly. She came up to me and asked me if I wanted to be the father of her

children. How was I supposed to know she was dead serious?" Bobby defended

himself.

"My head hurts," Remy moaned. He sank down in the driver's seat of the car.

Bobby jumped in on the passenger side.

"I've noticed somet'in' I'm sure Hank would like to know; de more time I spend

wit' y', de more my head hurts."

"What do I care? I'm *this* close to getting killed!" Bobby held his hands a

couple of inches apart.

'Mon Dieu, my head hurts. Wonder if he'll go away.. Wonder if I can scare him

away..' He glanced over Bobby and saw the desperate expression on his face.

'Probably not.' He sighed. "All right. I'll help y'."

"Yipeee!" Bobby shouted and his face lit up. "You're the best! I'm never going

to say another bad thing about you ever again!" He opened the car door.

"Not so fast," Remy said. Bobby froze and looked over at him."Sit down."  Bobby sat down."Close de door."  Bobby closed the door. Remy started the car and drove out of the garage.

 

^^^^^^^^^^^^

 

"Where are we going?" Bobby asked when they were about halfway to town.

"First of all," Remy started. "Dis is de absolute last time I do dis for y', got

dat?" Bobby nodded. "Second, no kissing or I'm out."

"But.." Bobby started.

"I don' care. No kissing, got it?" Remy looked sternly at Bobby. Bobby nodded.

"Third, y' do de monitor watchin' fer me de next four weeks." Bobby nodded

again.

"Fourth, you're gonna owe me to de end of time dis time, but I'm sure I'll come

up wit' somethin' later on. I can' come up wit' somethin' right now, though, so

dat'll have to wait." Remy drove the car in to the mall's parking lot and parked

it there.

"Now, we go get rings," he told Bobby as he got out of the car. The key to any

successful pinch was planning, and Remy  had decided to that maybe if he treated

this like a pinch about to happen, then maybe this wouldn't feel so .. well,

silly. And not to mention idiotic.

"What?" Bobby looked confused at him. "Rings?"

 

^^^^^^^^^^^^

 

"What about this one?"

"Are y' kiddin' me?"

"Okay. What about this then?"

"No way in hell am I wearin' dat. Not even for an hour or so," Remy exclaimed

and looked with horror at the ring Bobby held up for him to see.

"Well, this was your idea, not mine! You find one!" Bobby put the ring back in

the case.

The woman behind the counter looked strangely at him, so Remy grinned at her. He

looked down at the rings displayed and pointed at two of them."D'Accord. What

about dose?"

Bobby followed his finger and looked. He shrugged. "Fine by me." He then saw the

price.

"Are you kidding me? How much money do you really think I have?"

"Unlimited," Remy answered and grinned at him. "We'll take dose," he told the

woman who was still looking strangely at them.

"I can't afford it! Are you listening to me?"

"Non, dat seems to get me in trouble, so I've decided dat from now on, I'm jus'

goin' to ignore you. An' you can pay me back later," he added as he paid for the

rings with his credit card.

"When did you get a gold card?" Bobby asked suspiciously.

"When I nicked Warren's," Remy replied and handed Bobby one of the rings.

"Right size?"

Bobby tried it on. "Yeah." He looked up. "You nicked Warren's credit card?!"

Remy nodded and slipped the ring on his finger. "Good t'ing I did too."

"He's gonna kill you!" They walked out of the jewelry shop.

"Nah, he'll never know dat it's gone."

"You don't think the bill might make him a little suspicious then?" Bobby asked

sarcastically.

"Never has before."

"You mean you've.. eh.. borrowed his card before?"

"Yeah. So?"

"..Nothing."

Remy grinned to himself. The card was his, but who said he couldn't have some

fun until he had to meet Milli's brothers? Which reminded him.. "What do dey

look like?" Bobby looked confused at him.

"Who?"

"Milli's brothers?"

"Oh." Bobby paused. "Eh.. Think of a cross between an American gladiator and

Conan ‑ the barbarian."

Remy stopped dead. "What?!"

"Wasn't kidding when I said they would kill me," Bobby said. He looked a little

amused.

"How many?"

Bobby grinned. "Four. Ted, Bob, Chris and Jake, if I remember correctly."

'He's crazy,' Remy decided. 'Absolutely nuts.' "An' what, pray tell, makes you

t'ink dey'll won't kill you anyway even if I do come wit' you?"

"One of them is gay," Bobby explained. "That's what gave me the idea."

Remy shook his head. "My headache is gettin' worse," he informed Bobby.

"Sorry."

"I'm sure y' are. Now, I still don' get your reasonin' here.."

"Well, I just thought that if she thought I was gay, she couldn't get me to

marry her. Follow me so far?"  Remy nodded and spotted a café a couple of feet away. He started walking towards it. This thing would *really* require some planning.  "And that worked." He tilted his head slightly. "Not without some..Well, it worked. And I thought that was it, you know?"

"Yeah, I know. So did I," Remy answered and sat down in a free chair. He felt

this incredible urge to hide his head in his hands and just sit like that for a

couple of hours until things started making sense again. Bobby sat down across

the table and continued his explanation.

"But then she called and told me that she still wasn't convinced and neither were her brothers, but if we went out to dinner with them.."

Remy held his hands up in front of him. "Hold it. Are y' tellin' me we're goin'

to a *restaurant*?"

"Did I forget to mention that earlier?" Bobby asked innocently. Remy glared at

him.

"Okay, I'm sorry, but I knew there was no way you'd agree to this if you knew we

were going somewhere in public, and as I said, I don't wanna get killed," Bobby

explained. "And besides, this would be just as embarrassing for me as it would

for you if the others found out."

"Pro'bly more so," Remy muttered under his breath and swore once again that he

would never, ever agree to anything Bobby suggested ever again.

"What?"

"Nothin'." 'This is going to be a loooong day..'

^^^^^^^^^^^^

"...So where did we fall in love again?" Bobby asked for the seventh time and

Remy *really* wanted to scream. Well, either that or just kill him himself. The

last option was starting to look like the best..

"We were already friends an' we wen' 'way fer a vacation to N'awlinsan' dere we

fell in love!"

"Could you repeat that? Your accent is getting worse," Bobby said.  Remy glared at him. Bobby's eyes widened. "Right. New Orleans. Got'cha."

"About time." Remy closed his eyes and leaned back in his chair. They were still

sitting at the café and Remy's headache was getting worse by the minute. Bobby,

however, seemed to be enjoying himself. 'Sadist,' Remy thought.

Bobby looked over at him.  "Are you okay?"

"Headache," Remy answered shortly.

"If you're really sick, we could cancel," Bobby offered.

Remy opened his eyes to glance over at him. "And go through this again another

day? No thanks." He closed his eyes again. Maybe if he couldn't see him then he

could pretend that this whole farce was a nightmare...

"You don't have to do all the planning, you know," Bobby said. "I could‑"

"Remember who got us into dis in de first place," Remy interrupted. "Oh. Right."

And then there was silence for a long time. So long that if Remy hadn't known

better, he might have thought that Bobby had got up and left. Remy opened his

eyes. He was right. Bobby was still there, looking down at the table and

creating patterns of ice on his plate. Remy frowned. "Bobby?"

"Yeah?" He didn't look up.

"Y' okay?"

"Yeah. Just thinking."

'Oh no.' "About what?"

Bobby shrugged. "Nothin'."

"Not getting 'nother brilliant idea, are y'?"

Bobby shook his head.

'Thank you.' "Den what?"

Bobby looked up. "Why do you care?" He was looking surprised and puzzled at the

same time.

"I.." Remy started, then realized that he wasn't sure what Bobby was asking

about. "About what?"

"About what I'm thinking? Thought you'd decided not to listen to me anymore."

"I had, but den y' stopped talkin'." Remy wasn't sure he was following his own

line of thought this time.

"So you're saying that all I had to do to get your attention was to shut up?"

Now Bobby was looking oddly at him.

"I guess.."

Bobby shook his head. "You're weird, you know that?"

"I'm starting to lean towards insane myself," Remy muttered. "So what were you

thinkin' about?"

"You, actually."

Remy blinked. "Me?"

Bobby nodded. "Yeah."

Remy was about to ask what Bobby had been thinking about him when he saw Rogue

and Jean coming out of a clothes shop. They were talking to each other and

grinning like maniacs. And they were headed straight for the café. He glanced

down at his hand, then tried to get the ring off his finger. The word being

'tried' here. The ring was stuck. Now, that didn't have to be a bad thing. He

looked over at Bobby. " Can you get your ring off?"

Bobby looked confused at him. "What?"

"Jeannie and Rogue is headin' dis way. Can you get your ring off?"

"Oh." He tried to get the ring off. "Ooops. Maybe they won't notice?"

"C'mon," Remy said and got up of his chair. "I think it's time we leave dis

establishment."

"We could just tell.." Bobby stopped. "And then we'd never hear the end of it.

Let's go!" He jumped off his chair and they disappeared out of the café just as

Jean and Rogue entered it from the opposite entrance.

 

 

"What time is it?"

Bobby glanced down at his watch. "Quarter past eleven. Why?"

"An' when's de dinner?"

"Seven."

"Hmm," Remy said. They were sitting in the car ‑ which was still in the parking

lot ‑ and Remy was trying to remember if there was something he had forgotten.

He couldn't come up with anything, but that didn't mean that there wasn't some

little detail he had overlooked.

"Remy?"

"Huh?"

"Do you still have a headache?"

"Yeah, why?"

"I was just thinking.. You should take a pill or something."

"I can't."

Bobby looked at him. "Why not?"

"Medication like dat knocks me out," Remy explained absent minded. He was going

through a checklist in his head, so he wasn't paying much attention to what

Bobby was saying. 'Rings, check. Plausible story, check. Future plans, check.

Clothes, check. No, wait a second.' He looked over at Bobby who was dressed in a

yellow sweater with a South Park print on and blue jeans. "Where 'zacly are we

goin'?"

"Going? Oh. Quake. Why?"

"You need to borrow some clothes," Remy said. "I'm not goin' anywhere in public

wit' you dressed de way you usually do."

"Hey, I *like* the way I dress!" Bobby objected.

"I'm sure you do."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Bobby asked suspiciously. "Never mind. I

probably don't wanna know," he added a second later.

"Pro'bly not, but I'll tell you anyway." Remy started the car. "Bobby," he said

and drove out of the parking lot. "You are what de women's magazines call a

'fashion disaster'."

Bobby chewed on that for a mile or so. "I'm not," he said finally.

Remy arched his brows.

"Okay, so maybe I am. What's the big deal anyway?" He looked curiously over at

Remy. "I mean, you're taking this awfully serious considering it's only a scam."

"You want it to be de end of all dis, neh?"

"Yeah.. Of course I do."

"Den jus' trust me, okay?"

Bobby was quite for a while. "Okay." There was a strange expression on his face

Remy wasn't sure he liked. "Just as long as this gets me away from Milli.."

"It will. If you can play your part, I'll play mine."

^^^^^^^^^^

 

"Bobby, I think you're startin' to forget one thing here.." Remy said two hours

later when Bobby had tried on, and rejected, almost all the clothes Remy owned.

"What?" Bobby frowned at his reflection in the mirror. He was dressed in black

pants, a white shirt and a black vest with a discrete silver pattern. Definitely

not his usual style. Not Remy's usual style either to tell the truth. Someone

must have given him the vest for Christmas or something.

"I'm helpin' you out here outta de goodness of my heart. Don't make me regret

this more dan I already do." Remy sat down on his bed and studied Bobby

critically. "Dat's not so bad, by de way. Feels like dere's somethin' missing

though."

"Yeah, your looks," Bobby agreed, and then sighed. "Let's face it; we're not

going to find anything that doesn't make me look like a hooker, or a twelve year

old dressing up for Halloween, or a bad copy of you." He turned around to face

him.

Remy stared at him. Then a smile slowly spread on his face and he jumped on his

feet again. "Wait here!" he shouted as he ran out of the room, down the stairs

and in to the kitchen. He looked around with a wild expression in his eyes.

Finally he settled on one of the men present. "Scott!"

Scott froze with the coffee cup half raised up to his mouth. "Huh?"

"I need to borrow dat green jacket of yours. Where is it?"

"In my closet. But what do you.." That was all Remy heard before he was on his

way down to the boathouse to grab Scott's green jacket which he had just

realized would look prefect on Bobby.

Scott exchanged a confused look with Warren. "What was that all about?"

Warren shrugged. "I have no idea." They went back to reading their newspapers.

Two minutes later.

 

"Well?" Remy looked at Bobby.

Bobby looked at himself in the mirror. He smiled slowly. "I guess it'll have to

do," he said finally. "By the way, isn't this Scott's jacket?"

Remy nodded.

"Yeah it is. Now, I was plannin' to catch some sleep before we're

goin', so.."

"Okay." Bobby disappeared in to the bathroom, then reappeared carrying the

clothes he'd been wearing before. "See you later," he said cheerily before he

left the room.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^       

 

Remy didn't like Milli's brothers. Mainly because they kept staring at him like

they were visualizing how he would look chopped in to tiny pieces, but also

because one of them kept putting his hand on Remy's thigh. He wasn't

particularly fond of Bobby at the moment either. He was sitting there, smiling

and chatting amiably with Milli. Without even wincing once! And he had only been

here for ten minutes. Remy's headache was returning with full force.

He batted Milli Brother #3's hand away. It wasn't that he couldn't take on

Milli's brothers in a fair fight (of course 'fair fight' in Remy's eyes included

use of his kinetic power and bo‑staff), it was more that he couldn't do it now.

And he really wanted to punch that S.O.B. that kept grinning at him like a

shark.

Remy glared at Bobby again. Maybe if he kept up with the glaring Bobby would

notice and finally realize that the longer they stayed at the restaurant, the

more in debt he was going to be. By now, Remy estimated his debt to reach over

at least three lifetimes.

"..Why settle for a scrawny guy like that when you can have *me*?" Milli Brother

#3 asked. For the fourth time or so. "I mean, really, why?"

"He's nicer dan you are," Remy answered, which was true. Normally Bobby was

quite nice. Except when he was pissed off at Remy because of Rogue or when he

tricked (Remy wasn't sure how, but by now he had decided that Bobby had  somehow

tricked him in to this) people in to doing completely idiotic things.

"But I can be nice," Milli Brother #3 leered.

Remy sank deeper into the chair he was sitting in. 'This is just perfect. Just

perfect!' He was never doing Bobby a favor ever again. 'Hmm.. Maybe I can punch

him out later..'

"You really are *lovely* today," Milli told Bobby. "Are you *quite* sure you

*don't* want to marry *me*?"

"Well, you know," Bobby said. "I can't."

"Because of *Remy*?" The last word was said with clear distaste.

"Eh.. Yeah. Right, Remy?"

"Yeah, sure, whatever," Remy replied sourly. That was the n‑th time she had said

that. He removed Milli Brother #3's hand from his thigh again.

"Wanna dance?" Milli Brother #3 asked with another leer. Milli Brother #1 and #2

glared at him. Milli Brother #4 grinned in a way that told Remy with all

possible clarity that he'd just come up with a new way to kill either Remy or

Bobby. Remy wasn't quite sure. Milli Brother #4 seemed to dislike both of them.

"Non."

"Oh c'mon! I'm sure *Bobby* won't mind," Milli Brother #3 said. They both looked

over at Bobby who turned red.

"Eh..Well. Um. See..Eh..That..eh..um.." Bobby said.

Remy rolled his eyes. "What he's tryin' to say is dat he'll mind. *Right*?"

Bobby nodded. "Right."

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

'Okay, that's it!' Remy more or less jumped of his chair and stalked out of the

restaurant, barely remembering to grab his jacket. Well out on the pavement he

started walking, almost hoping ‑ not, scratch 'almost' ‑ that one of the Milli

Brothers was coming after him. It didn't necessarily have to be #3, though that

would definitely make him feel better. Much better. All he asked for was just

one of them to knock out. Was that really too much to ask for? He had after all

stayed there for a whole half hour.

"Remy! Hey! Remy! Wait up!" Bobby came running after him. "You were gonna

*leave* me in there? What kind of friend are you?" he said accusingly when he

came to a halt behind him.

Remy turned around. "Friend? Dat's a new one. And besides you seemed to be

enjoyin' yourself."

"Enjoying myself? Have you lost your mind? Oh and I'm sorry about what Chris

did.." Remy couldn't believe it was possible to turn as red as Bobby was at this

minute. "I mean, really. I didn't.. I mean, if I'd known he was that .. um..

forward, I'd have traded place with him. No matter how much Milli scares the

living hell outta me."

"She scares me too," Remy admitted reluctantly. He suddenly found himself

grinning at Bobby. "Let's get de hell outta here before her brothers decide to

follow you. Dat is, did dey look like dey were about to follow you?" he  asked

hopefully. He realized that they should probably be going, but just one punch...

Bobby shook his head. "Nope."

"Merde. Oh well, let's go den."

"I'm with'cha." Bobby flashed him a grin as they started walking towards the

car. "And that takes care of the Milli situation, as Scott would say. Or so I

hope."

Remy shuddered at the thought of another encounter with Milli ‑ and her

brothers. 'It's been kind of fun though. Bobby really is kind of..' He spent the

drive back to the mansion telling himself that he was not that far away from

turning thirty and that in itself was bad enough without him getting

attracted to guys all of a sudden. Not that he was, mind you. Not at all.

 

 

Remy crossed his arms over his chest and refused to admit that he was blushing.

 

"Can.. Can.. You re.. repeat that?" Jean wiped away a tear, but unfortunately  

she didn't kill that huge grin on her face at the same time.

 

"I'd rather not," Bobby said. He was, for some reason or another, not   blushing

at all. He was not even going slightly pink! Unfair! Capital UN‑fair!

 

"Ah wanna heah it again!" Rogue demanded from where she was rolling on the

floor, clutching her stomach and laughing her ass off.

 

"Yeah! Me too!" Jean echoed and looked expectantly at them. With a huge grin

plastered on her face.

 

Remy sighed. He really wished they would stop doing that.

 

Before he or Bobby had the chance to explain things ‑ again ‑ Scott wandered in

to the living room looking puzzled. "Jean? What's so funny?" Then he noticed

Remy. "Oh Remy, can I have my.." Then he noticed Bobby. He blinked. ".....jacket

back?" he finished, looking even more puzzled. "Bobby, what are you doing with

my jacket?"

 

"Wearing it," was the calm reply.

 

Rogue stopped rolling on the floor long enough to grab the remote and push play

again.

 

"Rogue!" Remy complained. "Have mercy, will ya?" She'd already played that part

of the tape eight times before.

 

"But it's so .. *sweet*!" She managed to get out before she was overwhelmed by a

laughing fit again.

 

Jean nodded. "Yeah, it is," she said dreamily. "You two make such a nice couple.

Don't you think so, darling?"

 

"Huh?" Scott said. He was staring wide‑eyed at the tv screen which was currently

showing Bobby and Remy in the middle of what looked like a rather passionate

kiss.

 

"Bobby, Remy, aren't they a nice couple?" Jean repeated.

 

"Eh.."  Scott said and looked from the tv to Remy to Bobby and back at the tv.

"Eh.."

 

"We're *not* a nice couple! We're not even a couple! Bobby, tell dem!" Now even

he couldn't deny that he was blushing.

 

"I have. They're ignoring us." Remy noticed again that Bobby seemed to be amused

by it all. "I'm sure they'll come to their senses when they've humiliated us

enough." He moved his hand out of his pocket and drew it through his hair.

 

"Look!" Jean squealed. "Rogue, look!" She pointed at Bobby, who blinked in

puzzlement. "They even have matching rings!"

 

"They do?" Rogue got up off the floor, walked over to Bobby and Remy, took a

close look at their hands (Remy had to fight the urge to hide his hands behind

his back) and started giggling. "They do! This just keep getting better and

better!"

"Or worse an' worse depending on how you look at it," Remy muttered to no‑one in

particular.

 

"Oh don't worry, Remy. I'm sure they'll get tired of this sooner or later,"

Bobby said reassuringly.

 

"How come y're so calm?"

 

Bobby shrugged. "I dunno.  'Cause things can't get much worse, I guess."

 

"Wouldn't bet on dat," Remy said darkly. Something told him that this was about

to get even worse. Whether he had a precognition, or he was simply pessimistic,

he didn't know, but when the doorbell chimed, Remy just *knew* that that had to

be Milli. With or without her brothers. "Don't open de door!"

 

Everybody in the living room looked at him.

 

"Why not?" Scott asked finally.

 

"Because it's Milli!"

 

Bobby went pale at hearing the dreaded name. "Are you sure? How can you be

sure?"

 

"Milli!" Jean and Rogue squealed in delight. "It's Milli! C'mon, Jean, we have

ta meet her!" Rogue said and ran out of the living room quickly followed by

Jean.

 

Bobby and Remy exchanged looks of horror and decided that now was as good a time

as any to disappear quietly in to the night. In other words, they turned around

and ran out the backdoor just as Jean and Rogue opened the front door to let

Milli and two of her brothers in to the house.

 

"*Where* is *Bobby*?" The beautiful blonde they recognized from the mall's

surveillance tape asked.

 

"Are you Milli?" Jean retorted.

 

"Yes, I *am*. Now *where* is *Bobby*?" Milli demanded to know.

 

Rogue blinked and tried to hold back her laughter. This was just too much! She

could hardly wait to see Bobby's face when he saw her. Or Remy's for that

matter.

 

"Who is that handsome looking guy?" One of the Milli brothers asked.

"Huh? Who?" Jean turned around and spotted Scott by the stairs. "Oh him. My

husband."

 

"Too bad. Do you have a happy marriage then?" He followed Scott with his eyes as

Scott hurried up stairs.

 

Jean grinned. "Very."

 

"Damn."

 

"Chris, *control* yourself," Milli said. "We're not here so that *you* can find

yourself a *boyfriend*!" She stomped her foot in the ground. "We're here to find

*Bobby*!"

 

"An' find him yoah will," Rogue said and grinned widely. "He's in the living

room. Just follow me.."

 

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

 

"I'm freeee! I'm freeeeeeeee!" Bobby shouted. He waved cheerily to an elderly

couple whom Remy just drove past. They looked shocked at him.

 

Remy grinned. "Why do I get de feelin' dat you weren't as cool 'bout dis as it

seemed like back at de mansion?"

 

Bobby looked innocently at him. "I have no idea what you're talking about."

 

"Of course you don't."

 

"Okay, wanna hear the truth?" Remy nodded. "I was this close to fainting when

Rogue put on that tape. By the way, you didn't give it to her did you?" Bobby

looked suddenly suspicious at him.

 

"Yeah, 'cause I so enjoyed their hysterical laughter and teasing, didn't I?"

 

"Guess not."

 

They were silent for a while, then Bobby asked: "Where are we going?"

 

Remy shrugged. "I dunno. I jus' wanted to get de hell away from Milli an'  

whatever brothers might be accompanying her."

 

"What makes you so sure that whoever was at the door was Milli anyway?"

 

"Ever heard of Murphy's law?"

"Which one?"

 

"De one about 'If somethin' can go wrong it will, an' at de worst possible

moment at dat'?"

 

"Oh that one."

 

"Yup."

 

"Yeah, I've heard of it. Get your point. I guess her showing up with her

brothers was the only thing that could make that any worse. Well, except Jubilee

showing up, that is." Bobby shuddered at the thought. "Imagine what she's gonna

do when she finds out. She's never gonna let us live this down, you know."

 

"I know."

 

"This wasn't one of my best ideas ever, was it?"

 

"Non."

 

"You want me to shut up, right?"

 

"What was your first clue?"

 

Bobby shut up, and Remy glanced surprised over at him. Then he shrugged and

focused his concentration on keeping them on the road instead.

 

5 minutes later...

 

"You think she's gone now?"

 

"It's only been 15 minutes. I doubt it," Remy replied.

 

"Oh. Do you mind if I turn on the radio?"

 

Remy shook his head. "Non, jus' as long as it's not country."

 

Bobby grinned and leaned forwards to turn on the radio. On the way he somehow

managed to brush his hand over Remy's. Remy pretended not to notice. And besides

he hadn't done it purpose, had he?

 

//‑‑‑Now to a caller who has requested this song to be played for her friends

who have found love together. To Remy and Bobby, here's 'You Light Up My Life'

by LeAnn Rimes from Jubilee! Enjoy!//

 

They both blinked and stared at the radio. "How..? What..? When..?" Bobby said.

Remy just stared, wondering if he'd heard right.

 

//So many night I'd sit by my window,

waiting for someone to sing me his song,

so many dreams I kept deep inside me,

alone in the dark,

now you've come along,

and you light up my life,

you give me hope to carry on,

you light up my days

and feed my night with songs‑‑//

 

Bobby turned off the radio. "I wonder if Emma would be too upset if I killed

her," he thought out loud.

 

 

 

     

 

Tempting Fate

by: Esprit

 

“What I wanna know is how she found out so fast,” Remy said as they were driving down the road headed no where in particular.  “Who could have told her and who else knows?”

“What does it matter now, we’re doomed!”

Remy sighed.  “Yeah, we are.”  After a slight pause he continued, “Why did you have to drag me into dis?  Couldn’t you have jus’ fessed up to it– told her you didn’t mean it like dat instead o’ lyin’ an’ makin’ such a mess?”

“I think you’re forgetting the matter of her gargantuan brothers.”

Remy huffed.  “Well at least you wouldda died like a man.”

“Remy--!”

“What?” he spared him a glance away from the road.

“You actually wanted me to get beaten to death by those--?!”

“No, Bobby,” he said rolling his eyes.  “I’d never wish any harm on ya,” at least no permanent damage.  Wounds heal and he’ll get over the chores¼  “I’m just sayin’ it wouldda saved you trouble if you’d told de truth from de start.  You honestly think dat as an X-Man I could sit back and watch dem beat you up?  You think nobody else would come to your rescue?”

Bobby sat back and thought about that for a while.  After a long few moments he spoke, this time in a very calm and thoughtful tone.  “You would have helped me in a fight?”

“Yes, Bobby.  De problem is dat as X-Men we don’t usually go ‘round fighting people without de same advantage we got.”

“So¼my way was less violent, right?” he asked as if he were trying justify his actions ex post facto.

“It came close dere a couple o’ times, but yeah.”  It sounded like he was encouraging him¼forgiving him at the least.  Maybe he was¼.  He understood Bobby’s reasoning.  He’d never want to be stuck with Millie.  Of course, Remy just would have disappeared on the woman instead, which was something Bobby was less adept at doing.  He looked over at Bobby sternly.  “Don’t get de idea dat dis gets you off de hook or anything.  You still owe me ‘bout five lifetimes over.”

“I know.  I know,” Bobby said resignedly to the wind as it passed.

He wondered absently if disappearing had occurred to Bobby at all.  Maybe he could teach him.  The poor kid deserved a break from everything, and he could stand to be away from the X-Men at this moment-- especially with that tape in the mansion and Rogue and Jean laughing their asses off.  It would be a long time before they’d be allowed to forget it, so Remy didn’t see why they had to be there for all of that ‘long time.’

“You wanna disappear for a while?”

“I thought that’s what we were doing already,” Bobby pointed out.

“I meant for a long while.  Like a week maybe.”

“A week!?  Are you crazy?  We can’t be gone for a week!  What if something happens and the-“

“Bobby, you and I both know dat there ain’t nothin’ that’s gon’ happen at de X-Mansion or anywhere else in de world dat will require our attention.  Tings are quiet.  De X-Men can spare us for a week.  Besides, do you really want to go back dere to Jean and Rogue and Millie and her brothers?”

“No,” Bobby sighed.  “All right.  Where to?”

“Well, we’re headed south¼.”

“New Orleans?  You’re thinking about going down to New Orleans?!  Do you remember what our story is, Remy?  We fell in love in New Orleans!”

“So?”

“So why do you want to tempt fate?!”

“Bobby, are you sayin’ dat you think because I made somethin’ up dat it’s gon’ come true if we go to de place it was set?  So if we go to Kansas we’re gon’ be swept away by a huge tornado?”

“N-n-n-no.  I’m not saying that¼.”   Bobby looked at Remy.  Remy had to keep his attention mostly on the road, but he glanced back at Bobby every couple of seconds to see if he could read his expression.  God, Remy, if you could only understand.  The last couple of days have been¼fun.  I like spending time with you.  I’ve been so terrified of everything and you’ve been there helping me through it.  I want to thank you, but¼you’d take it the wrong way.  Bobby’s thoughts trailed into other paths.  Well, the least I can do is go where he wants.  I mean, he hasn’t been home in a while¼.  “All right, let’s go to New Orleans,” he conceded.

“All right!” Le Beau cheered in a low smooth sort of way that Bobby couldn’t decide if he liked or hated.  He noticed the car speed up.

 

 

“Where is he?!” shouted Millie at the top of her lungs.  They had searched the entire mansion-all except the restricted levels, which Rogue searched physically and Jean mentally without telling their guests, but the two men were still no where to be found.

“They seem to have disappeared,” Jean explained to Millie.

“Remy’s car is gone from the garage.  I bet they took off,” said Scott coming back from the garage.  He had come back down from the stairs, but stayed as close to his wife as he could, and asking her to please put the suggestion into the lug’s head that Scott wasn’t desirable.  She had done so subtly to the best of her abilities but he was still eyeing Scott from afar.

“Took off?  How dare they!  Bobby’s just trying to get out of marrying me!”

“Ummm,” Jean, what do we do?  I sympathize with Bobby to a certain extent.  Not that I would ever propose and go back on my word, but Bobby really doesn’t seem to want to be with this woman.  Do you think we should continue with their story?

This poor woman has, by her view been proposed to and been left at the altar.  What do you suggest we do?  Lie to her, Scott?  Tell her that Bobby and Remy are involved?

You saw them kiss.  I mean, you didn’t scan them right?  So how do you know they’re not involved?

They denied it up and down, Scott.  What more proof do we need?

Haven’t you ever heard of homosexuality not being very acceptable?  Don’t you think they’d be scared to tell us and maybe want a bit more time before they came out even to their friends?  I know Bobby and I also know that he can be really scared at times like these.  You two laughing at them probably didn’t help matters any.

Scott¼I didn’t even think about that¼ Jean thought sheepishly.  I’m sorry, Love.  We can at least tell her that we don’t know anything for sure.

Thank you.  “Well, you see, miss, we actually don’t know if Remy and Bobby are involved.  They haven’t told us about it.”

“See!  I knew it.  He’s trying to leave me!”

“Now, now, sugah.  Don’t be so hard on Bobby.  I’m sure he’s just confused is all,” Rogue offered.

“Bobby said he would marry me.  Why won’t he?”

“Sugah, Bobby’s got some thangs to work out.  He’ll be back soon.  We’ll call y’all soon as he gits in, all right?”

“Okay¼.  Thanks a whole bunch.”  She hugged Jean and Rogue before she left, Rogue having to react quickly to keep from touching any of her skin.  “Good-bye!” she shouted on the way out, her brothers following her, Chris looking back at Scott as they left.

There was a release of tension in the air that felt like a sigh in the foyer of the mansion.  “Well, glad that’s over,” commented Scott.

“Of course you are.”

“Ah kinda liked Millie.” Rogue said.  “Why did ya say that ya didn’t know whether Remy and Bobby were involved, we know they’re not.”

“How?” Scott demanded.

“Well, how do you know they are?” countered Rogue pointedly.

Scott didn’t have to think long.  He found what he was looking for after reviewing the tape in his mind.  “You don’t share a kiss like that and not have anything between you,” he stated finally.  To Jean and Rogue’s surprise, he was quite serious.

Interrupting the air and being a bit awkward, the phone rang and Jean went to get it.  “Hello, Xavier’s School for--?  Oh, hi Jubilee!  Wolverine?  Oh, he’s out on the grounds here somewhere.  Can I give him a message?  Okay, I’ll ask him.”  She paused for a moment listening to Jubilee.  “Here?  Oh, not much.  Just a little fiasco with Bobby and Remy.  Hm?  Oh, there’s a woman Bobby’s trying to avoid and he thought he could get out of it by saying that he and Remy were now dating.”  Jean had to hold the phone away from her ear to keep from becoming deaf at the laughter on the other end.  “Yes, we all thought so,” she said after she had put the phone back to her ear.  “You want to talk to who?  Bobby?  Oh, he and Remy left a few minutes ago.  They’re probably driving along in Remy’s car right now listening to the radio trying to ignore what’s been going on¼ What?  Jubilee?  Hello?  Jubilee?  He-“  She turned to those who had gathered by her telephone conversation and said, “she hung up.”

 

It was getting on toward dusk and the radio had been off since.  Neither one of them wanted to take the chance of equally mushy songs being dedicated to them on not one, but all the different radio stations in the area.  If Jubilee was anything, it was thorough when playing a prank.

“Do you think we’re ever going to get out of this?  I mean, Jean and Rogue love the idea so much and Scott’s got to be indifferent still¼ Jubilee, God, she’s probably got it in the papers across the country!”

“Not dat anybody’d know who she’s talkin’ about.”

“I guess there’s that.  Still, she’s told everybody we know by now.”

“Dat’s why we let it blow over and when we get back, we say dat everybody’s mistaken.”

“Wait a second-if we’re gone for a really long time and nobody knows where we are¼ don’t you think they’d think that we’re like¼ on a honeymoon or something?”

Remy looked over to Bobby so fast that they were lucky that he didn’t swerve.  “Say what?”

“They’d have all the more reason to believe that we’re actually going out instead of it being this sham gone wrong!  Maybe we’d better go back?”

“And face Millie and her barbarian brothers soon as we get there?  No thanks!  You need to give her time to forget about you and move onto somethin’ else.  Send her a post card from some place along de way here sayin’ dat you’re never gon’ see her again.  She’ll get de idea.”

“But if I send a post card wouldn’t it remind her of me?”

“Not if you do it tomorrow mornin’.  She’ll get de post card while she’s still thinkin’ ‘bout you, den it’ll all be gone by de time we get back ‘couple weeks from now.”

“A couple weeks?!  Hey, you said just one!  Besides¼do you think you could stand me for more than a couple of days anyway?  We’d drive each other nuts!”

Bobby had a point.  He wasn’t sure how long he could¼ looking at Bobby he saw the concerned expression on his face.  His eyes all wide and blue; mouth slightly parted in anticipation and dread; hope set in every feature to not be rejected.  How could he let such a cute face¼down?  Cute?  Bobby?  Cute?  ‘Dere’s dat damn thought again!  Ignore that.’  He’s just a team mate.  You live with this guy on a regular basis; you can live with him for a couple of weeks.  “We’ll see, Bobby.”

Bobby closed his mouth and turned his eyes back to the road they’d both taken to watching.  The silence was not comfortable, but it was the only thing that seemed natural enough to actually do.  Their individual thoughts consumed the time that lagged by as they drove. 

After a while Bobby noticed that he couldn’t see all that well and it clicked that they had been driving for quite some time without their head lights on.  “Hey, Remy, did you know that you’re driving without your head lights?  That’s dangerous.”

He looked over at Bobby with a puzzled glance, then turned the head lights on.  “What’s de big deal?”

“I couldn’t see a thing that was in front of us, how were you driving?”

“It’s a thief’s trained eye, dat’s all.”  In actuality it had been Remy’s unusual eyes that allowed him to see in the dark.  He didn’t know why he’d been driving without them, but he guessed it was because dusk crept up on him and as his eyes adjusted, he didn’t need the lights.  He was glad Bobby noticed, or they might have been pulled over.

They drove on without incident until Remy’s vision started to fuzz over.  “How long we been drivin’?” he asked, blinking to buy clear vision for a couple more seconds.

“I don’t know.  Four hours, maybe.  Getting’ tired?”

“Little.”

“Want me to take over?”

“An have you get us lost?!  No thanks!”

“Wha’d’ya mean, ‘get us lost!?’”

“You ever driven to N’Awlins b’fore?”

“No¼”

“Den don’t say y’ wouldn’t get us lost.  I’ve recently picked up de mutant ability of precognition.”

They both knew that he hadn’t, but Bobby also knew that he’d never been this far south driving, so there was a large possibility of him getting them lost.  Besides, he was getting tired too.  They’d both had a stressful day.

“Well, what do you want to do?”

“What else do you do?  Find a motel.”

“A m-m-motel?  What about s-sleeping arrangements?”

“We’ll get a room with two beds, Bobby, relax.”

“O-okay.”  What if they ended up sleeping in the same bed?  How would that happen?  There’s no conceivable way they’d end up in the same bed.  Remy wouldn’t let that happen.  He felt relieved that Remy wouldn’t let that happen.  Not necessarily comforted, but relieved.

The nearest motel said vacancy, thankfully, and they pulled into its parking lot to go see the office clerk.  Remy went alone and asked for a room with two beds.  To his dismay, the clerk replied that they only had one available room with one bed.  It was a Friday night and the local town kids took up all the rooms with two, and even those with one.  The clerk winked at him and held up the key to the room she was going to offer him.

He sighed and took the key, signing the paperwork and handing her the appropriate amount in cash for the night.  He signed under an alias and was out to the car to get Bobby.

“Okay, where’s the room?”

“Bobby¼”

“What?  You’ve got a key, we’ve both had a hard day, so lets hit the hey.”  Remy sighed.  He’d have to show Bobby what he meant; he couldn’t seem to find the words.  He took the key over to the corresponding door and opened the room.  It opened to a small room that when Bobby looked inside he gasped.  “There’s¼. there’s¼ Remy, there’s only one bed,” he stated as if Remy wouldn’t know.

“I know.  I’ll take de floor.”

“Floor?  Are you sure they didn’t have another room?”

“I’m sure.  Look at de vacancy sign behind us.  It says ‘NO VACANCY,’ Bobby.  Dis was de last one.  Now, we can either stay here de night with me on de floor, or we can drive a little longer and get into a crash before we reach de next town because de next one isn’t for a ways.  What is dere to worry about?”

“Okay¼” Bobby said tentatively closing the door behind him.  He walked to the bed and sat down to take off his shoes and sox, but that was all he dared undress.  Remy, on the other hand was getting down to his shorts.  Bobby looked at him and watched as he moved.  Remy turned around and saw Bobby watching him and the discomfort in the room shot up. 

“You¼ watching me for a reason, Drake?”  Ouch.  He hated it when he called him Drake.  So far, he’d found that it meant he was really mad at him.  Bobby’s eyes shot to the floor and he began to crawl under the blankets.  “Now hold on a minute,” he said and Bobby stopped.  “You’re de one who likes ice so much and can’t catch cold, so I nominate you to be de one who sleeps without covers, cause, dere’s only one set.”

“Well, why can’t we share the covers?”

“Dey don’t reach down to de floor, Bobby and I certainly ain’t joinin’ you in dat bed.”

“I meant, why don’t we split them up?  You take the heavy blankets and I’ll take the sheets.  And why don’t you sleep with your clothes on, it’ll give you more layers to keep you warm with.”

“I can’t sleep in my clothes.  Dey get all bunched up around me and I can’t sleep like dat.  Come on, don’t tell me dat de Iceman is ‘fraid o’ de cold.”

“No, here, take the blankets.” He shoved them Remy’s way and Remy began to prepare a make-shift bed out of them and then set his clothes on top of the covers to keep him warm.  He snuggled down under the covers trying to get comfortable, using his arm as a pillow, but after a while his arm would fall asleep.

“Bobby, could you spare the pillow?” he asked.  Bobby threw it at him and it pounded him in the face.  Okay, what’d I do now?  Bobby’s upset.  “What’d I do?”

“Damned uncompromising, selfish, insensitive, merciless, pigheaded, asshole,” muttered Bobby.

“Am I really all dat?” Remy asked from his propped up position on the floor.

“Yes!” Bobby exclaimed, even though he hadn’t meant for Remy to hear it.

“Because I wanted de blankets I’m a damned uncompromising, selfish, asshole?”

“You forgot merciless and pigheaded,” he growled.

“All because I wanted to keep warm?”

“No, because you didn’t think I wanted to.”

“Bobby¼I thought you liked de cold¼”

“I do!  I just¼also like being warm sometimes¼.”

“I’m sorry, Bobby¼ I didn’t know.  Look, you can have de covers and I’ll sleep under de bed, all right?”

“Under the¼ why?”

“De cramped space acts like a huge blanket trapping any heat dat’s under dere in.  An’ since dere’s no draft, it shouldn’t bother me.  I’ll be fine.  I’ll just sleep in my clothes anyway and tings’ll work out, kay?”

“Are you sure¼?”

“No, but it’s either dat or have you be mad at me.”

“You know there is another option¼.”

“Don’t even-- Bobby, how could you even suggest something like dat after all de mess we been through?!”

“It’s just the next logical choice.  It doesn’t mean we’re attracted to each other or anything.”  Remy thought about it and looked at Bobby and thought about it some more.  Was his face telling him that he just wanted them both to be warm for the night, or did it speak of deeper things¼ hidden things that neither one of them could figure out.

What was he thinking?  This was Bobby Drake who had most recently slept with a girl (which was what got them into this mess in the first place) and Remy LeBeau, ladies man extrordinaire.  They weren’t gay and there was no implication in it by trying to keep warm.  He’d spent the night in the same bed as friends lots when he was a kid. 

“All right, Bobby, scoot over,” he said picking up the blanket and tossing them over the bed.  Once the covers were situated to Remy’s satisfaction, he crawled in next to Bobby bringing the pillow with him.  Putting it down, he offered half of it to Bobby.

Remy was asleep before long.

 

It was true that Remy spent the night with a few friends and cousins when he was a kid.  They even slept in the same bed for much the same reasons.  There was one night that came back to him as he drifted off to sleep that he hadn’t thought about in ages.

His friend Thommi was spending the night that week end.  He and Remy had been extremely close back then.  That night was a turning point in their relationship.  And it was not a turning point for the better.  After that night, Remy had just stopped wanting to see Thommi and Thommi didn’t ask as often to see Remy.

The boys were talking as they often did about girls.  Such was the wont of teen-age boys.  “Do you know what it feels like to¼ you know¼ do it?”

“Non,” had replied Remy.  “I know what it’s s’posed to be like¼”

“Like what?”

“Well, like your hand, stupide.”

“I’ve heard dat too, but¼ what does it feel like when your hand’s not feelin’ it too?”

“I don’ know.  Never had ‘nother hand to find out with,” he responded casually.  They were both looking up at the glow-painted ceiling that Remy had arranged last year when Remy felt something unusual.  He recognized it as the hand of his friend, but he was trembling so¼ and his hand seemed to be on an even more unusual course.  The hand skirted along his thigh, just barely touching him, then farther over across his thigh and beyond to a place Remy had only touched himself til now. 

He looked over at his friend in the pitch darkness only to see his friend watching him closely with wide, fearful, hopeful eyes.  Remy’s mind was filled with uncertainty as his friend brushed his boxer shorts.  His body was reacting as if it had a mind of its own.  His heart pounded harder and where his friend’s hand was started to stir with the familiar tingle of arousal.  He swallowed, but nothing more.

Proceeding just as gingerly as before, the hand drifted up a tad and he slipped under Remy’s boxers.  He hadn’t thought it was possible for his heart to beat any faster, but it did.  He found breathing a chore as his friend’s hand found what it was looking for and brushed over the velvety soft skin.  Remy’s breath caught in his chest and refused to come out again.  Thommi’s hand brushed more, sending tingles Remy’d never felt before through him.  When he grabbed him around and started moving up and down him in a familiar rhythm things felt impossibly strange and good at the same time.

Thommi took small signals from Remy, an escaped breath, the tiniest moan, sharp intakes interrupted as signals to speed up or change rhythm or pressure.  These were all things he’d seen in himself when he did this with himself.  He breathed hard and quick as he finally came to the point the entire act tries to achieve.  Climax.  The point where everything feels so impossibly good and you can’t hold back any longer and you explode in more ways than one.

Remy was trembling and finally had the courage to look back at Thommi again.  He swallowed trying to find something to say to him.  Was he trying to find out what it was like and going to ask Remy now to explain that incredible feeling?

“Rem¼Que-est-ce que¼ça-comme?” asked Thommi quivering with fear.

Remy tried to find his voice, but couldn’t speak.  His mouth was dry and he was trembling with a strange tingly feeling still running through him.  Instead, he reached over to his friend, who had already removed his boxers, to his surprise, and felt him the way he had just been touched. 

Thommi was so soft!  He was also very hard.  Remy was breathing hard again, this time in trepidation.  Thommi was the one who was in heaven at the moment.  He was determined to send him through the heaven Remy just experienced.

Remy barely ever talked to Thommi again and when they did talk, they never mentioned that night or what happened.  After that, Remy started seeing Belle in earnest, often in secret.  To this day, no one knew about his venture into the homoerotic experimentation.  He wasn’t sure about how he felt about that night and had simply chosen not to think about it.  Not until tonight, that is.

Thommi had always been a good friend.  Even after the night that drove them apart.  They simply grew apart.  A great deal he was sure due to discomfort on both sides, but it was more discomfort about what that night meant to them and their relationship more than anything.  Did that mean that they were all of a sudden gay, or were they simply experimenting with the only things available-- each other?  Was it a phase?  He doubted that one.  It would have been the shortest phase of Remy’s life.

No, he still wasn’t sure.  He wondered what he’d say to Thommi if he ever saw him again. 

His dream was more a memory than an actual dream as Remy tended to dream memories.  It was a good dream, though and he wondered as his thoughts became more on the conscious side if he had creamed the sheets.

The haze of dream waking made everything seem unreal.  He could feel someone next to him¼Thommi?  There was the warmth and weight of someone on top of him, the softness of skin and the faint odor of shampooed hair.  Opening his eyes he was relieved to find that it was still dim in their room.  The head and torso resting on him was his travel companion; that he remembered.  He wasn’t traveling with Thommi though¼  Bobby!

It was Bobby who was using him as a pillow.  Poor Bobby.  If he caught himself like this he’d be devastated.  Remy was comforted by the fact that he had probably gotten himself into that position unconsciously, while dreaming about some girl.  He’d laugh if it was Millie.  Though, she was the last woman they’d be having good dreams about.

Slipping gently out from under Bobby, Remy got dressed.  Taking the room key with him he left to go get breakfast.  He knew there was a fast food place around here somewhere.  Motels and fast food existed in a profitable symbiosis, which happened to be convenient for everybody.  As it turned out there was a Jack in the Box around the corner.  Good as any other place.  Remy walked there mulling over his dream and other associated complicated thoughts.

Bobby woke and knew something was up immediately.  That something being parts of him that were usually up after such an encouraging dream and also¼Remy.  Remy was gone.  He didn’t see the key on the night stand where Remy’d left it nor did he see Remy’s clothes.  Just to make sure, he checked under the bed.  No Remy.  Bobby did find his shirt across the room though.  That was odd.  He must have thrown it off last night being too hot from Remy being in¼bed¼with¼him.

Remy left!  Tossing his shirt on, he ran to the door and peeked outside.  The car was still there.  Remy had just stepped out.  Probably for a smoke or to get something to eat or something.  He had only gone for a second; Remy wouldn’t leave the car.  Remy had Warren’s gold card, he could get another car and it wouldn’t leave Bobby stranded, but it would get him away from him-damn!

Ohmygod, Remy got upset last night and left!  Bobby thought panicked and not even sure why he was panicked.  He had the car¼but Remy was gone!

He got his shoes on and was about to go outside searching for him when the door opened and in walked Remy holding a couple of white Jack in the Box bags.  “Hey, Bobby.  See you’re awake.  How’d ya sleep?”

The look on Bobby’s face spoke of betrayal.  He probably woke up and thought that Remy’d abandoned him.  After all he said last night about being there for him, he goes and assumes the worst!  “Look, it’s okay, I just went to get food.  Hungry?”

“You scared me.”

“I didn’ even take de car!  You’re over reacting.  Now, relax.  Eat something, den we can go, all right?”  Bobby nodded after taking a breath the size of a hurricane.  Remy handed Bobby a white bag that smelled pretty good.  Looking into the contents of it, there were generic kinds of fast food but anything would look good right about now.  He hadn’t had dinner last night.  They had rushed out in quite a hurry.  Which made him think about Scott and everyone else back at the mansion who would be wondering where they were.

“Should we call Scott?”

“Scott?  Why?”

“Well, he is our team leader and everything¼ don’t you think he ought to know where we are?”

“If he knows, then Millie could know soon after.  Jeanie and Rogue seemed pretty taken with de idea of all dis, dey’re bound to tell her.  I say we call ‘im, tell ‘im we’re fine and ‘we’re on a road trip, sorry, can’t come back now-bye.”

“Is that fair?”

“What’s not fair, Bobby?  We’ll tell him we’re fine, which takes care of his leaderly responsibility to look out for us.  Dat’s all he needs to know.”  Remy began to munch down on a burger he’d pulled out.

“Okay, I’ll call him.”  Bobby picked up the phone and dialed the mansion collect.

"Xavier Institute for Higher Learning,” greeted Jean.  After the obligatory collect phone call identification and acceptance, Jean began again.  “Bobby?  Where are you?  Is Remy with you?”

“Yeah, Remy’s here.  I¼can’t tell you where we are, Jean.  I just– tell Scott that we’re fine, but that we’re not coming back for a while.”

“Not coming back?  Why not?  Because of Millie?  We’ll work it out, Bobby, I promise,” she offered.

“Jean¼” Bobby pleaded.  Let me just spend this time with Remy.  I want him to at least like me and I owe him so much¼  “Please¼?”  He heard Jean sigh over the phone.

“I can’t make you come back, so I’ll tell him.”

“Thanks, Jean.”

“Before you go, Bobby there’s something I have to ask you.  Are you and Remy¼involved?”  Bobby’s heart stopped.  He’d been thinking about everything that had happened in the last three days and how he felt about Remy.  Why had he said he’d do everything he asked instead of fessing up?  Did he mind doing things for Remy?  And what about that kiss?  Remy had kissed back.  He’d been thinking a lot about Remy and that kiss.  What it meant.  How he wanted to feel a kiss like that again.  “Bobby?”

“Hmm?”  Oh, right, her question.  Damn!  “Gotta go, Jean, Bye!” and he hung up.

 

“This just isn’t my week for phone conversations,” remarked a disappointed Jean Grey.

 

“What was dat all about?” asked Remy.

“Jean asked if we were ‘involved’.”

“An’¼ What did you tell ‘er?”

“I didn’t.  Just said I had to go and ‘bye.”

“Hmm.  Must be rubbin’ off on y’ or somethin’.” He commented absently, lost in other thoughts obviously.

“Yeah right,” mumbled Bobby.  Something like that.

They ate in relative silence for the next quarter-hour until they had stuffed themselves to points where they were satisfied with the sustenance level.

 

“N’awlins” was everything Remy had said it would be during their four-day trip down south.  There were jazz players on the streets and smells saturating the air that were nearly intoxicating.  Remy was in heaven.  The smile on his face told Bobby well enough that he’s missed his home.  They had taken a short tour through the downtown area and then the French Quarter before Remy started heading out of the city proper.

“Where are we going now?” Bobby asked.

“I thought I’d make y’ payin’ f’ dis a little easier.  ‘Stead of payin’ fifty bucks per night fer a slum, I thought we’d go see m’ family an’ stay dere fer free.”

“Umm¼ isn’t there one slight problem with that?”

“Like what?”

“Like you were banished and stuff!”

“Pff¼ Belle’s gotten over dat.  An’ I was banished from de guild, not my poppa’s home.  ‘Sides, you wanna take de chance dat some other motel’s all full up save a lone one-bed room?”

Bobby sank in his seat.  Remy hadn’t told him about how he found him when he woke up, but Bobby remembered the strange dream he’d had that night and did not want to chance Remy’s friendship, fragile as it was, on something being given away.  He really liked it when Remy was in a good mood.  On day two of their travels Remy’d gone through a brooding phase and he just wouldn’t talk.  Bobby was beginning to think he’d done something wrong.  He was inaudibly grumbling to himself all day¼ well, untill Bobby got him to come out of it when they stopped for their dinner.  He was more civil with food in him, but still not happy.  Not like he was now.  He wanted to keep him that way.  “No,” he said in a small voice.

“I didn’t tink so.”  Remy gave Bobby a sideways glance.  Why’d he have to think about it so long?  It could be the shame sinking in.  That was probably it.  He dismissed Bobby’s hesitance looking back at the small road that to him that meant the way home.

It took all of fifteen minutes to get to the LeBeau Estate.  It wasn’t as big as Xavier’s mansion, but it was big enough to impress Bobby.  “What?  You didn’t tink de LeBeau’s had money, did you?  Well, jus’ to put yer fears at rest, clan LeBeau used to need all dis space.”

“Used to?” he asked tenatively.

“De wars.”  Bobby nodded, not quite understanding what he meant, but remembering something about clan wars in his family history.  It was quiet the whole way up to the front doors made of mahogany.  Remy knocked on the door in a strange pattern.  Must be some sort of code.  Bobby made a mental note to ask about it later, but figured he’d forget anyway.

It took a few moments for the door to be answered but when it was, a man in a suit appeared.  The man greeted Remy and Bobby formally and started off down the halls into the mansion.  He let them into the parlor where seats were set up facing each other.  Directing them to sit, which Remy didn’t, the man then left the room.  Bobby chose a comfortable chair to sit in since he was a little nervous about meeting Remy’s father.  He decided it didn’t help him look like he was fidgeting less, but it did help the weakness in his knees.

A few minutes passed in silent waiting.  Bobby mostly squirmed in his seat and Remy paced a little, but looking more to pass the time than like he was worried.  When Jean-Luc appeared in the lounge, the air changed consistency.  There was a tension, unspoken that Bobby could feel, but Jean-Luc’s features were kind.  As were Remy’s but they were not as happy as he thought they’d be upon meeting.  A light embrace was exchanged and a few words in Creole when Remy interrupted them.  “Father, dis is Bobby Drake¼ he’s a teammate.”  Bobby stood upon introduction.

“Welcome, Mr. Drake.  What brings y’ here wit’ me son?”

“Well¼ it’s kind of a long story¼”

“Den maybe I’ll coax it out of y’ over dinner t’night.”  Bobby turned pale.

“Uhh¼”

“Maybe, poppa,” Remy assured.

“Den if y’ll excuse me, I have some tings to tend to.  Marque will show you where y’ rooms are. Dinner’s gone be at six-tirty, sharp.”

“Oui, poppa.”

“Pleasure meetin’ you, Mr. Drake.”  Bobby nodded and mumbled out something that passed for a ‘you too,’ as Jean-Luc walked away.

When he left Remy looked at him speculatively, as if he might grow another head if he wasn’t careful.  “What?”  Bobby objected.

“Y’heoh?” he mimicked the sound Bobby had made.  Bobby shrugged at him innocently blushing brightly.

“So I’m not brilliant when it comes to etiquette.”

LeBeau’s relaxed posture confused Bobby a little as he had not seemed all that comfortable around his own father, but his voice equally portrayed that he wasn’t worried.  “I’m sure he’ll forgive y’, Bobby.  ‘Specially if he gets a story out of us tonight.”

“No way!  Hunh-unh, nope, not tellin’!”

Remy took a few quick, silent steps over to Bobby and whispered into his ear.  “Not the truth, dummy.  Come out with me clothes shoppin’ an’ we’ll do some fabricatin’.”

“Oh, ha-ha, very punny, Remy.  Very punny.”

“Tanks.  Now let’s skedaddle.”  Remy dragged them out to the car and they hopped in and drove off.

Inside the LeBeau estate, Marque knocked in his identification pattern on the door to his Patriarch’s study.  The Patriarch was in a meeting, but nothing too sensitive.  “Come,” came Jean-Luc’s voice.  “Yes, Marque?” he asked as the house servant stepped in.  

“A delivery for you, sir from Audette” A tape was handed to him by his servant, who left immediately after.  Tapes of this nature were from the recording system around the house.  He stepped to his desk and pulled out his player from the desk drawer, pulled over his head phones and listened to the recording.

 

The two men were shopping at a store Bobby had never heard of and was pretty sure was a local shop.  Bobby had only looked at two price tags in the whole store.  After that, he stopped touching the clothes altogether.  When Remy noticed, he asked, “Aren’t you goin’ to get somethin’, Bobby?  Y’ clothes are dirty enough as it is.”

“I’ll wait til we get to JC Penny or something,” he said irked.

“Why not here?”

“Remy... do you know how expensive this is?”  He seemed to be asking that a lot lately.  Why did he even think Remy needed to think about the cost of things?  He was a thief– money– and property, no less, meant nothing to him.

“Tell you what...” his smile grew.  “We’ll just let Warren pay for it.”

“Remy–!” he choked.  “You can’t do that again– he’ll notice!”

“De boy has millions, Bobby.  He can share.  Besides, I’ll bet he won’t notice.  Not from dis place anyway.”

“Remy!” he pleaded earnestly.  It was something resembling the cry of a hurt puppy and that made Remy pause.  Bobby always worried about money.  He had to worry about it.  He wasn’t taught to view it as a tool and nothing more.  And the fact that he was an accountant probably factored in there somewhere.  He also cared for his friend, Warren.  Sighing, Remy walked over to where Bobby stood, a meter away and pulled out his wallet from the back pocket of his jeans.  Opening it was something he usually did to impress or intimidate.  Now, he was the one who was scared... and slightly awed by the experience.  He was about to do something he rarely did and because of which was difficult... or perhaps it was difficult, therefore he didn’t do it often.  He was going to admit to a lie.  Quelling a tremble, he opened the leather folds and pulled out his Gold Card, then extended it to Bobby.

Bobby took the card, unsure of what it meant, then looked at it unable to believe that Remy would give him one of his stolen prizes.  Would Remy really be giving him Warren’s...no.  The name was wrong.  Not Warren’s Gold Card... Remy’s Gold Card.  With his name on it.  Remy LeBeau in professionally raised letters on the front of the gold colored surface.  It wasn’t fake either.  Turning it over he saw that it had been signed by Remy... not that he knew his signature.

His mouth was open.  Remy had his own Gold Card... not that he shouldn’t– he was a thief.  Remy had been lying... why he couldn’t tell.  But most importantly, Remy had told him that he lied.  Remy told him.  Of all people on Earth to confess to– why Bobby?

“This is... the card that the... rings–?”

“Yeah,” Remy mumbled to the floor.

“You... you don’t have Warren’s Gold Card, do you?”

“No, Bobby!” he declared softly, rolling his eyes.  “I don’ need de bird man’s money.”

Bobby smiled in spite of the comment about his friend.  “Then that means you don’t need mine, either!”

“I don’t need it, but you ain’t payin’ me back with money, now are you?  An’ speakin’ of which, you’re still at two lifetimes of owin’.”

“I thought I was up to three.”  Remy decidedly ignored that comment.  He had felt in a good mood and decided to let Bobby off one lifetime– like it would matter in the grand scheme of lives– and he decided to not take advantage of that.  What honesty bug was running around tonight?

The two of them got a handful of clothes to change into and were back at the house before long.  They were shown separate rooms to shower and stow their things, not that they had brought a lot with them.  It wasn’t going to be long before six thirty rolled around.

Bobby was pacing in his room.  Remy knocked on the door and opened it half way to peek in.  When he saw Bobby wearing a hole in the carpet he was concerned.  The boy was always worrying about one thing or another, and it seemed to never stop.  If he wasn’t worried about Millie, he was worried about money, and when he wasn’t worried about money he seemed to worry about something to do with Remy which he wouldn’t disclose in the past four days of travel.  “Hey, you almost ready?”

Bobby stopped and looked at Remy.  He couldn’t see much of him, but he looked relatively neat in a suit sans tie, the collar open.  He always seemed to like his throat exposed for some reason.  “Hi.  Sure, I’m ready.”  Remy made a quick wave with his hand and Bobby followed after.

 

Bobby sat nervously across the dinner table from Remy.  Jean-Luc could breathe in the fear and was sympathetic toward the man it was mainly emanating from.  He was after all, in the house of the head of the Thieves Guild of New Orleans.  What he found more difficult to understand were the small amounts of discomfort being displayed by his son.  Even when Remy was uncomfortable he had been trained well enough to not show it.  He was either slacking off or he was far more uncomfortable than Jean-Luc had seen him in quite a while.

“So, were you boys gon’ t’ explain t’ me why y’ came down fer a visit?”

“We’re hidin’,” Remy blurted.

“From…?”

“Something huge and terrible,” Bobby said.

“Yeah—responsibility,” Remy mocked Bobby.

“Hey!  You don’t have to make it sound like that!”  Bobby objected loudly.  Jean-Luc held up a hand and Bobby’s mouth was shut instantly.  He didn’t want to get in trouble with the kind of people Remy hung out with much less the man who raised him.

“Will dere be any trouble?”

“Not unless who we’re hidin’ from is more psycho and ten times smarter dan I tink she is.  Don’ worry, poppa, we jus’ harborin’ a fugitive for a while.”

“Ha!” his father laughed.  “Dat be what dis house was built for, boy.  So, I simply must hear dis tale.”

Bobby looked over at Remy hoping to be saved yet again.  “Not much to it, poppa.  Bobby couldn’t keep his hormones in check an’ asked me to help ‘im out of a jam when she came along wantin’ his life.”  Remy shrugged.

“What, you sleep wit’ an assassin, boy?  T’ought Remy be de only one stupid ‘nough t’ do dat.”

“No!  At least I hope she’s not.”

“She wants ‘im t’ marry her, poppa, an’ he ain’ ready.  She also got four broders bigger dan Gris Gris.”  Jean-Luc’s eyebrows rose.  “Yeah.  Dey want his life in more ‘f a bloody way if he don’ meet de femme at de alter.  We’re hopin’ it blows over soon.”

Jean-Luc looked ponderingly at Bobby, then turned to Remy.  “How’d you get dragged into dis?”

Sighing, Remy bent his head.  “I jus’ happened to be dere.”  Remy glared at Bobby, partly to add effect to his statement, partly because he really felt like glaring at Bobby.

“So den… you two are friends?”

Remy blinked at that.  Jean-Luc knew that meant Remy didn’t know what he was talking about or hadn’t thought about the introduced concept.  “Uh… yeah.”

Bobby reacted oddly to that.  Jean-Luc could have sworn that the young man was trembling.  Although, Jean-Luc noticed that he was as clear as a well squeegee’d window pane when it came to his display of emotions, interpreting them was another matter.

Jean-Luc looked back at Bobby and he grew pale.  “You enjoying y’ food, Monsieur Drake?”

“Um… it’s a bit hot…?”

“Hmm?”  Remy looked perplexed at Bobby.  “Oh, here,” Remy said as he stood up, reaching out for Bobby’s bowl.  Bobby handed it to him hoping that he’d get something in return.  Remy disappeared into the kitchen doors and was gone a few minutes.  During that time Bobby tried not to fall apart in front of Jean-Luc.

“De oder X-Men couldn’t help you?”

“Oh—if I’m a bother, I can leave, that’s not a problem—“  Jean-Luc held up his hand again for Bobby to stop as he noticed it had worked the first time and it did a second.

“Didn’t mean t’ alarm y’.  Y’ are welcome here.  It’s simply dat my son doesn’t usually bring people here.  He wouldn’t unless he trusted de person completely.  We are a discreet, but illegal operation as I’m sure you know.”

“Well, so are the X-Men.  Remy knows I wouldn’t tattle.  We chose to come here because Remy hadn’t visited in a while and we needed some place to disappear to.  Thank you for your hospitality, by the way.  It’s nice of you to put us up.”

“T’ink nothin’ of it.”

Remy walked into the dining room from the kitchen with Bobby’s bowl in hand.  Here y’ go, Bobby.  Should be less spicy now.”

“Thanks…”  Bobby stared at Remy.  He did what to his—rice soup?  Tentatively taking a bite from his soup he was surprised at how flavorful it was when his mouth wasn’t begging for mercy at the intensity of it.  “What did you do?”

“Still too hot?”

“No, it’s great, but what did you do?”

“A chef never reveals his secrets,” he smiled smugly.

Bobby shrugged and dug into his soup.  Remy was relieved that his modifications made it more palatable for Bobby.  It was amazing what a little tomato sauce could do.

“Mattie’ be furious if she caught y’ doin’ dat, Remy.”

“I only did it to Bobby’s plate.  He was ‘bout t’ die from de heat.  Dem northern heathens have such a sensitive palate.”

“Excuse me—heathens?”

“Relax, Bobby.”

 

Dinner wasn’t as relaxed as Remy would have liked, but it wasn’t as bad as Bobby with Hank or anything.  Once finished, the after dinner chat started and Bobby became quieter than Remy had ever heard him be in a social situation.  Of course, Jean-Luc steered the conversation toward Guild business, so it was understandable.

Eventually, Belle was brought up and Remy had to sigh.  “G’ night, poppa.”  Remy rose and Bobby was beside himself.  He didn’t know whether to follow or not.  He didn’t want to be left with the Patriarch of the Thieves Guild all by himself, but he didn’t want to seem like he was following Remy like a puppy either.

He figured he could seem like a puppy to Remy’s father and he’d be okay with that.  Hopefully he would never have to see this man again after the trip was finished.