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Title: I Would've Loved You Anyway
Lyrics by Trisha Yearwood
summary: I was going to leave this open…let the reader
decide who the POV should be...but in the end I settled for
Disclaimer: I do not own any rights to any Marvel Characters nor to any of the wonderful songs of Trisha Yearwood, I just love both.
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Three years….
Three years to the day, and it doesn’t get any easier. I can still hear that door slamming. Slamming with such finality. It didn’t drown out the sound of my heart slamming into my chest though, nor did the roaring of your bike engine stop the sound of your voice in my ears…and the words you uttered. “Because you don’t care…”
If I'd've known
the way that this would end
If I'd've read the last page first
If I'd've had the strength to walk away
If I'd've known how this would hurt
Because I don’t care….how wrong could you be? If only you’d known. If only after all those years you’d stopped for one moment and asked me, did our life together mean that little to you? Oh god, listen at me….I’m thinking about myself again. I know it did, I know it meant the world to you. I know that you did what you did because it was necessary. I know you left because you needed to, not because you wanted to. I just never thought it would end the way it did, the way you left. I never thought it would hurt so much. I thought I would get used to it, the pain, like I’ve always done. But that’s not how it works is it?
I would've loved you anyway
I'd do it all the same
Not a second I would change
Not a touch that I would trade
Had I known my heart would break
I'd've loved you anyway
I never thought I’d love a man like you. Never thought I would allow someone like you to get so far under my skin. You made me itch with it at first, it made me uncomfortable to think I was falling for you. But I guess I did. I still think back to those weeks we finally realised and I smile to myself. The itching stopped and it started to tingle instead. You just seem to change before my eyes. I was no longer scared of how I felt about you...it just felt right. Maybe if I’d known then what I know now…I guess im only trying to convince myself….
It's bittersweet to look back
now
At memories withered on a vine
Just to hold you close to me
For a moment in time
Its nights like tonight, when it all comes back to me. when we would have been holding each other, watching the stars, talking about everything and nothing. Making plans, thinking about the past and the future…that’s when it hits me the most, I think about the good times, the great times; the battles, the excitement of it all, that adrenaline rush knowing you were at my side. But then the pain comes; the arguments and aggression, two strong-willed souls unable to back down…I know what it was you wanted; Me. To be just with me, nothing else, not this world, this life-style we lead, the people we spend our lives with, just me. But I couldn’t see it could I? I couldn’t see what it was, why it was you wanted that. I didn’t want to change things, to rock the boat. All I wanted was to carry on as we were…happy, content. My selfishness got in the way I suppose. If only I’d realised….
I would've loved you anyway
I'd do it all the same
Not a second I would change
Not a touch that I would trade
Had I known my heart would break
I'd've loved you anyway
The hardest thing is missing the sound of your voice and the touch of your hand. I still wake up in the night and find myself reaching out for you, trying to find that warmth beside me...but its just not there. Sometimes I hear people talking on the street; a laugh, a murmur and I turn, smiling, thinking it is you…but who am I kidding. For a while I carried around the neckerchief I bought you, just so I could smell you, but it didn’t help, I even bought the newspaper you loved to read on Sundays, but could never bring myself to sit and read it.
Even if I'd seen it comin'
You'd still have seen me runnin'
Straight into your arms
I think, looking back now, I sort of knew the way things would go. That even though I could never imagine what it would be like without you I knew the day would come, deep down. Yet still, I told myself back then, and now, it wouldn’t stop me loving you. It wouldn’t change the way I felt and still do. If you came back tomorrow it would be like you’d never been away. I’m not saying it wouldn’t be hard but I understand now. I know what it is you wanted. Love. And I never showed you just how much I did love you. We were more than just team-mates and partners, we were lovers, and the bonds we made, no matter how strained, how twisted they become, will never be broken.
I would've loved you anyway
I'd do it all the same
Not a second I would change
Not a touch that I would trade
Had I known my heart would break
I would've loved you anyway
If you asked me, “Would I do it all again?” Would I put myself though the passion, the excitement, the heartache, the loss, all over again. The answer could only be yes. Because I found in you the love of my life, the true beginning and end to my existence because no matter how often I regret the moment you left and how my heart breaks now just thinking of it…I would've loved you anyway Remy.